Would you fuck a Brexiteer?

Well, would you? Or a Trump supporter? A Corbynite? A communist?

It certainly feels as though politics is dividing society more than it ever has in my lifetime. It feels like the UK is split firmly into Leavers and Remainers, and then split again on the left and the right. Being politically aware means you’ve probably categorised yourself at least somewhat into one or more of these “groups” and those who don’t subscribe to the same views are at best thought-provoking and at worst utterly intolerable.

Of course i’m talking about those that firmly sit in their “group” and are incredibly passionate about their doing so, rather than those who are vaguely sort-of a believer in something-ish. Although the sort-of lot aren’t so likely to rule out intercourse with rival group members, there are those (myself included), who feel so strongly about certain issues that it’s a total deal-breaker, an utter relationship annihilator, if they’re pitted against those with a view entirely opposing their own.

Remember the couple in America who got divorced because one of them voted for Trump? I get that. Brexit is something I care massively about, when we voted to leave the EU, this wasn’t a “gee that sucks but we best get on with it!” moment. It was crushing; I spent the next day in bed in a pit of existential despair. To me, it wasn’t just that the economy was going to suffer, but rather the country had become so insular and afraid of foreigners it would rather cut itself off from its neighbours so it could stubbornly try to make all of its own rules and “take back control” of its borders. Jesus Christ…

Because I feel so emotional about Brexit, it is very hard for me to stomach those that believe so strongly in it. Now I’m not talking every Leave voter here, I appreciate many people were ambivalent and just sided one way or the other. Some people just thought we’d be better off out, and weren’t driven by racism or stomping nationalism or some sort of deranged belief that Little Britain can be a superpower once again. They’re ok, I know a few of them and they don’t bring my blood to boiling point. But those who loudly bark that they wanted to “take back control!” and “close the borders!”? Pass me a bucket.

I haven’t got any hardcore Leaver friends, and I don’t think I ever will. I’ll certainly never fuck a stomping Brexiteer any more than I’ll fuck a wild badger. Does that make me an arsehole? Possibly, but I imagine I’m pretty repulsive to the “take back control” brigade, too. I suppose it isn’t really any different to firmly concluding that you’ll never fuck a misogynist, or a Daily Mail reader.

The problem with my admittedly extreme stance is that we’re in danger as a society of only ever surrounding ourselves with those who agree with us. Much like a CEO may surround themself with ‘yes men’ which we all know is not a clever thing to do. While I think it’s entirely acceptable to rule out certain “quirks” from those you might date, it’s probably not acceptable to live in a bubble entirely made of those who are just like you. Occasionally the other side might have a valid point, or you could be tricked into assuming you hold the mainstream view when in fact you’re the freak. Imagine for example, you live in an online space that allows you to believe wholeheartedly that Theresa May is an actual robot and so you base your entire voting habits on stopping the progression of automation. It’s out there, but it could happen.

While I won’t fuck a Brexiteer, I’ll be sure to follow them on Twitter and read their garbage in the tabloids and the Torygraph if for no other reason than to remember why I have ruled out vast swathes of the population from my hypothetical dating pool.


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